Tuesday, 5 June 2007

Just my own mind dairy

Oh no... I have been suffering sleepless nights in those days. I tried to sleep early but my mother's presence refused to give me a sleep of peace. She watched the television so late at night for the stupid Hong Kong shows. Well... My mum and i shared the same room but we slept separately. I have my own room but it does not have the air conditioner. How to sleep well with the feeling of heat? (=.=) I must do something about it but i do not have much money to revolt against it. How long must i wait for my job to give me the money? Lord, teach me how to be patient during the troubled times. *praying* When i finally get the money, i would definitely have the new air conditioner installed in my room and replace mum's old air conditioner with the new one as well. Maybe i will add one more to the living room as it's full of dirt and bad scent due to my aunt's junk clothes. I'm sure that the passer bys would not like to experience the unpleasant scent from my home.

I want to sleep early so that i work out in the morning and grow big and tall. My mum doesn't share that thought but instead, she saw it as the childish and crazy dream. Why is she like that all those years? Mum, do you know that you are really ruining my dreams, physical and spiritual means? I know that you concern about me but you are really destroying me if you control me. Do you want me to be like my aunt who suffers mental illness? My aunt is like this because her parents locked her in the room for days for her just young desire for having the boyfriend. There is really nothing with the teenagers having serious relationships as long as they are clean. Even my friends who got the serious relationships long time ago, are still doing well now. It seems that my family has the style of stubbornness in their bloodline. I just say that they are just brainless people because they always think that they know me well even though i don't talk much. Like last time, my father gave me the coffee while i asked for the Root Beer at the coffee ship in the night.

I desire to grow big and tall because if i were that big guy, i would probably have the advantage in the games. How nice would it be if i became Big Show, the Great Khali or Andrea the Giant? I know that i have to train a lot to play well but I'm hearing impaired.So I'm at the disadvantage. But i have faith in God. It does not matter whether I'm big or small guy as long as I've perfect faith in God. It's all up to the Lord whether i should grow big and tall. When i got the money, i would definitely buy the supplements for the muscles and bones and work out a lot in the gym.

For this Saturday (9th June), I have the mixed feelings. Firstly, I'm very excited about it because I'm having the serious tests on that day. Triathlon and rugby league on the same day. It's very challenging to me. At the same time, I've been worried about it. I just worry about how to survive and still do well for those two tough challenges with much fatigue. I have thought of the solutions. Firstly, i must train a lot right now. I'm going to swim 20 laps (Bedok Swimming Complex), cycle more than 18km (East Coast Park) and run more than 5km (Bedok Reservoir) later on. Secondly, i must eat well. At least 3 meals per day. Thirdly, I must sleep well to recover the strength fully and reduce the fatigue and pain. Moreover, I'm looking for the water plastic jar which may be important for the tough challenges. I need cold water to refresh myself and reduce the heat. I cannot find one as i don't know where to buy it. I have checked the cookery stores and sports shops out but i cannot find one. It's very terrible but it does not matter as i can buy cold drinks such as Red Bull from the convenient shops.

That's all for blogging.

Cheers!~

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